Me: "Find you some pajamas. You can't wear that damp robe to bed."
Annie (disgusted): "I will TOO wear this damn robe to bed.... Wait.
Did you say 'damp'?"
Me: "I wanna curb stomp Taylor Swift."
Shanna: "Yay! Me, too!"
(This one's oldish. Rosie O'Donnell's on tv.)
Cory: I bet she eats babies.
Me: "Speaking of which, I had the weirdest dream the other night....."
Cory (cutting me off): "No."
And to Cory I would like to say, "Fuck you guys. I"m gettin' a pony."
That is all.
(refering to Annie, of course.)
Well, for one thing, yesterday morning on the way to school, she sang the lyrics to The Black Crows "Hard to Handle" better than most adults I know.
This was said last night while watching the Disney channel:
"Why do they call him 'The Rock?'"
"It is his big ole tit-taaaays?"
Moments later, she walks out of the bathroom in a fuzzy purple robe, skipping in the hall and singing "If I were an apple, a hangin' on a tree....."
Totally oblivious to the fact that I'm watching her.
A bit after that we somehow got into an arguement about whether Yoda would or would not play with a dollhouse. (Her: yes. Me: no.)
And she decided last week that she was going to start refering to all super models on TV as "Tiffany."
I love my kid.
She's so funny but has no idea she makes my life so entertaining.
Like a few days ago when someone on TV was talking about Christmas and Halloween all rolled into one.
She looked at me, wide eyed with a big grin and said:
"Ah! Vampire Santa!"
Or last night when I said I'd let her pick the movie and she started her own little version of hardcore dancing. Punching her fists at the floor.
(She knows nothing of hardcore dancing. I've made sure of that. So this was all her.)
But the most OMG thing she's done recently was last week. She walks into the living room, very serious. No smile at all, and says, "Is it a full moon tonight?" I think nothing of this, we discuss the lunar calendar often.
"No, it's not." I say.
"Oh," she says. And turns around and moons me.
Boy on bus: "Hey, how old are you?"
Annie: "Shut up. That's how old."
********* May 19th*****
Annie ran into the living room last night wearing just her underwear.
She threw up the rock sign with both hands and screamed, "I LOVE YOU!" then ran off.
Annie: "Destini, what are you thinking about?"
Destini: "Fried Chicken."
Annie: "(Gasp!) Me, too!!!"
It was not long after that Annie came up with the term "Specified chicken wing."
(At the golf course, mind you.)
Cory: "Do you think you have couple more holes in ya?"
(Immediate regret sets in.)
Me: "No. I think we've found them all."
Me: "Annie was asking me to have a spitting contest the other day."
My Dad: "Yeah. She just asked me if I wanted to have a contest to see who
could throw a dog farther over the fence."
Phone conversation between Annie and Cory:
Annie: "Guess what I did tonight!"
Cory: "What'd you do?"
Annie: "Burnt down a trailer!"
Cory: "..... were you SUPPOSE to do that?"